The Need to Have Freedom of Choice Does not Go Away with Age
“You have no choice.” Do you enjoy hearing those words? As an adult do you want to be told what to do in instances where your decisions are not harming or offending others? Do you want the length of your hem dictated to you? Where you can work? If you can drive? Where you can live? Of course not!
Then why are we doing this to our seniors?
“Grandma, you can’t wear that. You’re too old to wear that!” Or, “Well you’re 70 now so you can’t drive anymore.” How about, “What do you mean you got a job as a greeter? That’s embarrassing.” And worst of all, “Grandpa we decided it’s time for you to move into a home.”
Seniors are adults but far too often well meaning family members decide where mom and dad, or grandma and grandpa, are going to live without ever consulting the senior. It doesn’t matter if your family member is 75 or 100, if they are mentally competent (and even that can be subjective), they deserve a voice at the table and a say in their living arrangements. Yes, it may be more convenient for you to put grandma in a home, but is it best for her? What would she prefer?
All adults, including seniors, have a right to make their own decisions – even if those are bad decisions in your eyes. Of course, I’m not talking about grandpa who is legally blind choosing to drive, or grandma who is in late stage dementia living without support. I’m talking about having a say in their housing needs, what they eat, what they wear, and their choice of entertainment. (Hey if grandma is spry enough for roller derby, don’t talk her out of it!)
Families need to educate themselves on the options – housing could be a full facility, home care, or assisted living. Explore the options together. If your parents want to age at home, consider home care and how the house itself can be adapted. If grandma wants to live in an assisted care facility, explore ones that have the activities and values she needs. There are homes based around lifestyles and communities, and there are ward-style homes. Let her choose.
Thanks to the Facility Based Continuing Care Review, which I applaud, more advocacy is coming to help give seniors more choice in their long-term living needs. Specifically, policy directions 1 and 7 will help drive needed change.
- Policy Direction #1: Establish quality of life as the number one priority goal for Alberta’s Continuing Care system
- Policy Direction #7: Expand the choices available to Albertans who require continuing care services
When families, advocates, care home operators and governments work together, we can give seniors the choice of housing they deserve.
Another way to help drive this message forward is something I’ve advocated for years: fund the seniors, not the facilities. That may sound counterintuitive coming from a facility owner, but I’m adamant about this. Funding the senior gives the freedom to choose where to spend those funds, giving each senior far more control over their environment.
In the end, it is about choice. We all value our power of choice. Growing old shouldn’t take that power a way.
